28-year-old sister goes No Contact with siblings after they begin meddling in her love life, try to convince ex to get back together with her behind her back: "He tried blocking them and they just worked around it."

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    AITA for warning my siblings I will go no contact with them if they don't leave my ex alone?

    "They contacted him and pressured him to take me back"
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    My ex (30m) and I (28f) broke up 4 years ago because I cheated on during a manic spiral him and because in general I was in an unhealthy place with my bipolar disorder and wasn't taking care of myself
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    like I was supposed to be, which was all entirely unfair to him. The end of our relationship was a wakeup call and made me realize I had a lot of work to do on myself.
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    My siblings (25m and 23f) were really upset for me. At the time they tried to blame my ex and said he should have stood by me when I only cheated because I was sick. I told them I had hurt him and I had not taken care of myself enough to be a good partner. I also told them I needed to focus on me
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    instead of taking care of them like I was, something I did because we had awful parents and I always went into protective big sister mode). And by taking care of them I was working to not only pay for my own place but also to pay for a place for them to help
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    them through college and to help them with food and other expenses. And I would drop everything and go to them if they needed me. I was filling in where our parents were failing. But that was my focus and I let my condition go badly.
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    I went on medication and started therapy with a licensed therapist, where I had previously seen someone who was looking to practice and had no official qualifications of any kind because they were free. I spent some time after another long manic
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    episode in the hospital and I worked on rebuilding my life. My siblings survived better than the previous me expected. They were very caring and concerned about me and they helped when I came home. They were great. I will always be grateful to them for that.
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    But they didn't like that I decided to stay single and they got very invested in my love life. Which a few months ago brought them to my ex. They contacted him and pressured him to take me back or reach out and speak to me and say he didn't blame me. They made all these excuses about why I cheated and
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    accused him of never really caring about me like he said he did when we were together. My ex reached out to me and I apologized and promised that I would speak to my siblings. I told them to stop. That my ex had moved on and so had I and my decisions were mine and not his. They said he influenced
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    them and I said no. That my decision to stay single was all me. That I was not a good partner and didn't feel like I would be right now. I told them he'd suffered enough and they needed to back off. They acted like they got it. But two weeks ago my ex
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    contacted me again and sent me dozens of screenshots of the harassment my siblings were subjecting him to. He said he hesitated in reaching out because he didn't want me to spiral but he tried blocking them and they just worked around it. I apologized again and told him I'd deal with it.
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    I was so mad at my siblings. I told them to leave it alone and asked why they were wasting money on different phone numbers and all kinds of bulls .1 said it wasn't right and they were wrong to do it on my behalf when I had already said that my decisions
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    are my own. A day later they told me they felt I was too harsh and they were just looking out for me. At that point I couldn't see another way to stop them so I said if they didn't leave my ex alone then I would go no contact. That I would not have them drive someone else crazy on my behalf when I was the one at fault in our breakup. They were visibly upset
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    and asked how I could go no contact when they're only trying to help. They also said I couldn't go no contact because what if I get into trouble and spiral again. I told them I'm a grown woman and it would be my decision but they have some influence. They
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    can stop the harassment of my ex, who did nothing wrong, or they can accept the consequences and instead realize I'm to blame and my ex owes me nothing. I know it hurt them and I feel bad but I'm so frustrated they started this sh. AITA?
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    jrm1102 NTA - your siblings need to back off. You took accountability and got the help you needed. They need to respect your decision and process.
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    thomas Carol0p8 Yes, NTA. Keep boundaries.
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    swishcandot i think OP has been way, way overly enmeshed with her siblings, which, I get how it happened, but BOUNDARIES need to be made.
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    rustedlord It's not just that. The siblings' "help" is doing exactly the opposite of what they are trying to do. Any chance of the guy forgiving and taking her back is ruined by the siblings harassment. That guy probably wants as far away from OPs family as possible.
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    No_Noise_5733 Tell your siblings that their obsession is a sign of their ongoing mental health issues and they need to seek treatment.
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    Cute-Profession 9983 NTA they're harassing an innocent guy YEARS after the fact.
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    GalianoGirl NTA, but your siblings need therapy too. Their behaviour is not normal at all. Your Ex should look at getting a restraining order against them. And yes, you need to go no contact, but likely that will lead to an escalation of their bad behaviours.

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